


Pangs

by GorseMonster, Sheshaventures



Series: Consumption [3]
Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ascians (Final Fantasy XIV), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Female Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Patch 5.0: Shadowbringers Spoilers, Soul Bond
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-24
Updated: 2019-11-24
Packaged: 2021-02-26 16:55:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21551692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GorseMonster/pseuds/GorseMonster, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sheshaventures/pseuds/Sheshaventures
Summary: Ancient worries breed discontent, sow the fears of mortality, but together one might find new strength.
Relationships: Solus zos Galvus | Emet-Selch/Warrior of Light
Series: Consumption [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1484786
Comments: 5
Kudos: 39





	Pangs

**Author's Note:**

> The bridge between the first (and a half) and second movements. Things need to be addressed, before the next installation.
> 
> Not everything is idyllic.

The day had been long. The Warrior of Light is tired, her own mortality fixed in her mind, brought about by a needed risk taken while in the field. As quickly as she was able, she fled to her room in The Pendants, where she knew Emet-Selch, Hades, would be waiting for her. Upon her approach, however, she found him in turmoil. Her brush with death - that near miss - obviously affected him, though perhaps it was not merely that.

He had been growing solemn lately, and skittish at her attempts to get him to speak of what was troubling him. No longer, as the concern, the anguish, is written clearly over is face. She would hear him speak of it now, for his sake.

"You need to talk about it. I can feel it, Hades."

  
  


Hades' brow furrows and he draws her in for a careful, delicate embrace, threading gloved fingers through her hair. He does not answer her, closing his eyes and taking slow, measured breaths as he indexes every thread of fine hair on her head. He needs, but he does not. For what good could that do him, or either of them?

"You're here, safe. That is what's important."

  
  


She enjoys the touch, allows him his moments to ground himself, but she cannot be satisfied with that answer, "I am here, but you aren't, not like this. Don't pull away now, after everything. Don't shut yourself off again. Please."

  
  


A short exhalation tickles across her hair. A smile tugs at his lips. "My dear hero, I assure you I am quite alright," he leans into his own persona for the security he craves, "can I not simply be concerned for your well-being as the vaunted Hero of Darkness? Goodness, I shall have to be more mindful of that." Mind and soul drift apart, discordant with vocalizations betraying the feelings beneath flesh.

  
  


She does not share his smile, and pulls back, concern written across her face. "Please. Don't lie to me now, when you never have before. I can feel it, remember?" she presses one hand to rest over her heart for a moment, before touching it to his breast instead. "Please."

  
  


She is right. It is the first lie he has told her and it  _ hurts. _ It makes his breath difficult though he does not need to, and it makes his heart squeeze unpleasantly, though it need not beat. He cannot speak for fear he will simply lie again, and his gaze drifts to the side. He tries to find a way of describing what it is that gnaws and worries scars into his mind. She would think him foolish. He thinks  _ himself  _ foolish.

  
  


She feels it, and within them she presses forward to him as a soothing balm. Hands cup his face, thumbs placed upon his lips as she runs the pads of them along the length. "I forgive you, for that. I do," the sincerity is clear through their bond. "But I am yet here, love, please, speak to me? Lean on me, as I do you."

  
  


His face hardens as his jaw clenches with a slow swallow, and she can feel two directly warring feelings seeping to surface. What his voice can't express his soul is practically screaming, and his need to lash out, his need to  _ weep _ boil just below.  _ She is mortal. Mortal and fragile. And she is so  _ **_tired_ ** _ and takes such risks. _ His soul curls possessively around her, pulling her back in, an embrace so tight it makes her muscles ache, "You are..."

_ Mortal. Not her. Beautiful. Short lived. Not her. Just fragments but I love you and it  _ **_hurts._ **

  
  


She is swept up by him but even as he wraps himself around her she holds him to herself, arms cradling, protecting. Her soul entwines with his, not seeking to stifle his emotions, merely to be there for him, to show he remains not alone, "I am. I am all of those things. But I am  _ also still here. _ And I am going to  _ be here. _ And nothing will take me from you as long as I have an ounce of fight left in me."

  
  


His face pulls into a grimace. Yes. She is all those things. She is beautiful, she is fragmented and she is  _ his _ but... "A fine hero you'd be if you found a way to fight time itself," his voice is low, harrowed, and he tucks his face into the crook of her neck so she may not see the tears collecting at the corners of his eyes.

  
  


She holds him there, one hand splayed on his back and the other burying itself into his hair. She holds him there, holds him up, mortal yet able to support an ancient such as he. "I will age, yes. But it will be many years yet. We will have that time, every moment, every second, and none can take that from us. I will not allow it," she kisses his hair, gentle despite her firm declaration. "There are many mysteries in the world, in all worlds. Perhaps if I had stumbled upon one in the past, I would have left it alone, but now... Well. That is a chance regardless." She muses softly. "But my point is, love of mine, do not despair yet. Not while I am still here, healthy, with you. Have hope."

She cannot help but chuckle, "Besides, I have already fought the god of time himself, and still I remain."

  
  


Everything is different this time. He has seen her live and die thousands of times without ever remembering. He had courted her in many forms in multiple lifetimes and none of them were  _ this. _ All so much the same and familiar but _ this one… _

He sees fit to deny himself hope for it has done him naught of good in all his long millennia. But he will not deny  _ her. _ "You take such risks, mortal as you are and..." his body tremors and she feels his brow furrow against her neck.

He is weeping.

  
  


Solid, stable, a pillar of strength she is, holding him up, and now it is her turn to wrap around him. She is smaller, yes, but she can do this much. Hold him tightly without and within, fingers sliding up his back to brush the marks she left on his neck. She lets him weep, how could she not? He had lived ages, had known ages, and she had not. But she would not let it break him.

"I do, but should you wish it of me, I will take more care," the words are whispered, affectionate. She means them. She has never meant them before in her life, but she means them now. "It may be hard, and I do not know all you may have seen, but try, one last time. For hope, here with me."

  
  


Breaths tremble against her neck, wet tears against her skin as he does not respond for some time. She is mortal, and fragile, and a  _ hero, _ who does so much at risk to herself that he finds himself following her from every shadow he can, ready to intervene should even the slightest threat manifest. "Please," he whispers softly. A plea, at least a promise to try and alleviate the anxieties burrowing into the base of his skull.

She is mortal, and fragile and time itself may yet come but he feels the same way he did. That he could do this one last time with her, as she is.  _ For her. _

  
  


She wraps him tighter still, pressing a delicate, deliberate kiss to the side of his head. "For you, then. I will. I cannot change the heart of me, but I can do this, for you," a promise between them, felt by her soul and spoken from her lips both. "Do not ask me to stop, though, love of mine. You know I cannot. But perhaps, be with me, at my side?" the question is tentative, she knows how he remains bound. "Hope,  _ with me, _ and travel  _ with me. _ "

  
  


He knows she cannot stop. No more than he could cease scheming for another Calamity. He is able to consider her request for a few moments before something,  _ something _ somewhere inside him bubbles up. He feels it, chains around him, his throat...

Lifting his head to look at her, the whites of his eyes sore and flushed with blood. "I..." he cannot speak the words he wants to, and presses his forehead against hers. "Within as much as I am allowed."

  
  


Leaning her forehead into his for a brief moment, she allows herself a smile, stretching upwards to kiss him once, reverently, upon his third eye. Joined as they are, she feels the way he was bound, but chains may be lifted, tethers lightened. She slips herself between the bindings and his body, that sliver of light within his breast guiding her way. It itches, to do so, freezing cold, yet she does it anyway.

"That is all I ask of you, Hades," she speaks against his skin, lips lingering upon his brow. Her Blessing balks but she pays it no mind, refuses to let it rule her.  _ She's a bigger monster than it, anyway. _

  
  


Of all the strange things she has done with him, the most peculiar of all is this soft kiss to the bony ridge of his forehead. Not entirely without use, it adds a strange fuzziness to his mortal senses, blinking a few times. The heat of her soul winding between him and the tempering of his god is an impossible thing and yet it brings him relief, the ache of it lifting, raising his head to press his lips softly against hers, a gentle, chaste kiss that is as thankful as it is adoring.

He does not know how she defies not just Zodiark but Hydaelyn too, but in this moment he is thankful for it. He welcomes her, and her light, knowing it would not bleach away the abyssal pitch of his aether.

  
  


She kisses him back just as sweetly, as full of love, and when she speaks it is with a minute space between them. "Together, you and I can do anything, love," and she believes it, right down to the core of her. "Hold me while I falter, and I shall support you when you stumble. You are here, with me, and _ I am also here. _ Me. Not anyone else, no matter what you may have lived."

She is small, but she remains the mightiest of all, as she had always been. Her words fail her, declarations inappropriate for the moment, but her soul whispers her feelings.  _ I will not let it blind you, you will not let it smother me. Together, in gentle twilight in a sea of stars. _

  
  


Something of Emet-Selch rises in his throat at her words; he can't help but feel that trill of  _ Oh, I know I can do anything,  _ curling onto his lips. But he doesn't voice it, simply smiling in that familiar way, placing soft kisses to her lips between each of her declarations. "You are beyond all logic, dear hero. Utterly inscrutable and capable of defying things because, I believe nobody has told you that you cannot." He has understood so much, seen so many flaws repeated. Limitations, the same ones, over and over and over and over and _ over and over and over... _

But there is none of that in her. And every time he believes there is, she proves him wrong.

A slow breath quiets his racing mind and his soul shores up against hers, abyssal cold and the warmth of light balancing each other out. There is a low rumble of a purr in his body, fingers stroking through her hair slowly.

  
  


He smiles against her and she laughs brightly, "I do hope that you will not be the one to start the trend. It would be poor form for the both of us were I to have to prove you wrong again and again," teasing affection, easy, as easy as the next breath. "More than I already do. I'd make a poor Hero with an inflated head, and besides, your ego is already big enough for both of us."

The teasing is superficial, comfortable, and there is joy in her as his mind quiets. That she can provide him with this. That he believes her enough for this. They are temperate, together, mild in their joining despite her running so hot, him running so cold. She hums as he purrs, enjoying his touch, and rises to kiss his third eye a second time.  _ Attention on me, love. _

  
  


It's...a laugh. An honest chuckle of a laugh that escapes his throat, making a contented noise as she jokes back at him, squeezing her in his embrace. "Oh but, my love you  _ wound _ me. You would think  _ me _ egotistical? I am but a humble Architect while  _ you _ are the one with such grandiose titles." His smile is a light grin, one that reaches to his eyes, the simple joy of mortal banter lifting his spirit.

He lets out a soft, pleased 'hmmmh' as her lips press to the ridge of his forehead. It  _ is _ a strange feeling, fuzzing something small of his senses, perceptibly, but not in a way that renders him incapable of anything he would not ordinarily be able to do. "Warrior of Light,  _ Warrior of Darkness, _ " he begins to list off every title he knows she has, more dramatic with each one spoken.

  
  


She knows she will lose the battle  _ and  _ the war but still she continues, because of course she would, "Emet-Selch, Architect,  _ Angel of Truth, _ at least my titles are all ones foisted upon me, without my say in the matter. I am sure the fellows of Clan Nutsy have something to bestow upon me as well, and you can be sure it is not  _ nearly _ as grandiose as some of the others."

The humor is taking her, but still she fights the smile on her lips, playing the game.

  
  


He inclines his head. "I was elected into my position,  _ Defender of Eorzea _ and I know not where you find the history of the third one but I think you will find it  _ quite _ factual." His smile curls more on his lips. "The Hand of Mercy, Sky Pirate, Sister of Ash,  _ Raubahn's Left Arm... _ " he pauses, tapping his lips. "That last one seems a little in poor taste don't you think, my love?"

Playful, soft kisses tease her jaw. "Shall I stop, or keep going?"

  
  


Her laughter gets the best of her now, and she leans against him, enjoying the affections. "Alright, alright, gods, I had forgotten about that last one. Who came up with these, anyway? If I find out it was you or yours we are going to have  _ words, _ Hades." But she teases, laughing, and he can feel it all.

It takes several minutes for her mirth to die down, and she merely enjoys his company after. "It is good to see you feeling in higher spirits now, love," the smile is genuine.

She would keep it so, for them both.

**Author's Note:**

> Give! Us! Monster! Boyfriend! Hugs!


End file.
